How To
05 Mar 2021Today’s prompt: “Write a letter to a child explaining how to do one thing (for example, ride a horse or throw a punch).”
Hey, kid. Yeah, you. I’m going to tell you about how to escape when a cult to one of the Old Ones ties you up to be a sacrifice.
So the first thing you want to do is make sure they tie you up loosely. Hold your hands in front of you with your knuckles together, and pull your hands in close to your body. That’ll naturally make a gap between your wrists. And if they tie up your arms and chest, take a deep breath and tense all your muscles. That’ll make it easier to wriggle out later. If you let them tie you up real tight, you might as well sprinkle meat tenderizer on yourself and shout, “Hey! Cthulhu! Over here!”
Then you want to wait until your kidnappers are out of the room or aren’t paying attention to you, like when they’re all busy doing ceremony prep. Do not wait until you’re in the middle of a circle and they’re chanting “fhtagn” at you. Once they’ve all got their backs turned to you, turn your wrists back and forth to make the rope even looser. Try to work one of your hands out of the ropes, or if there’s something sharp and hard like the corner of a table or the edge of a countertop, you can rub the ropes against it until you cut or tear through them.
Keep an eye on all the cultists and sneakily untie your ankles. Make sure they’re all occupied before you try to run. One nice thing about most Cthulhu-worshipping cults is they tend to wear robes with hoods that cut down on their peripheral vision. If they’re about to start the ceremony and you can’t run without them seeing you, try to disrupt things by knocking over candles. With any luck you’ll set someone’s robe on fire and you can escape in the confusion.
Of course, none of this is going to do you any good if they tie you up while you’re knocked unconscious, or chain you up in a basement.